The Elusive Trail

How long can one chase before they are chasing a ghost? A shadow that grows as if cast at sunset, stretching further and further from its owner as the sun hides behind the horizon, leaving nothing but the void of darkness and masking the trail completely.

Can you pick up the scent again? Can you find the path you seek or will the increasing distance forever bar you from your goal, giving no pity to your weary feet.

How long before its pointless? A fools errand that will leave you with less than what you started with and posing a question of purpose in your heart and mind.

When should you stop? Relieving yourself of the weight of the search, deciding that enough is enough and although the battle was lost maybe, just maybe, the war can be won. The losses great, but not crippling.

Finding these answers is like finding the proverbial needle in the haystack only to prick your finger for your trouble.

Was it worth it? Was a lesson learned the hard way a lesson you really needed to learn, or was the naivety of your former situation all the better for its blissful ignorance?

Knowledge is power, but wisdom is the reins that allow you to make take control of that power and make full use of it's gift. With wisdom you can find the answers, you can find the path to your goal. You can make the hard lesson worthwhile in its heartbreaking teachings, fulfilling a purpose you may not have even realized was a possibility, shedding light on the trail anew.

This rebirth the sunrise. Bringing your own shadow ever closer to your goal, reaching ahead and grasping at the distance until you are able to take hold of that goal, finding a new bliss. One with peace and comfort and reminding you that the best rewards take the most time to get.

Never stop. Always search. Always reach. Always dream.

Eyes In The Mirror

They say the eyes are the portal to the soul.
I know this to be true.
For I can see the truth within myself in mine own eyes.

In one eye I see the bright light of love.
Reminding me of the man I can be.
The man I should be.
It guides me down the right path, the path of light.

The other eye showing the dark desires of my soul.
Burning deep within me
Showing me what I'm capable of.
The moments when I let my desires take control.

I wish it were as easy as closing one eye.
I wish I could simply choose which eye to follow.
But both eyes are open.
They both see the world.

Each eye fights for dominance.
Trying to pull my soul towards a version of myself that could be.
Sometimes one eye wins.
Sometimes the other.

Oh yes I know how clear the portals to my soul are.
Were one looking they could read me like a book.
My eyes telling the stories of my actions.
Penning my actions like a story to my soul.

When I look into my own soul I see both sides.
I know them both well.
I know the looks, the tells.
They are a part of me.

They are two sides of my same coin.
Constantly battling, Constantly struggling.
I know not how to conclude this fight, and fear that the conclusion would not be the outcome i desire.

I wish I were stronger,
Capable of deciding the outcome on my own.
But this battle is the battle fought by my life.
By the the very flow of events transpired.

Only time will tell which version will prevail
Which version of myself will complete it's control
They are both me, yet only half Of the whole
The two separate, yet very much the same.

I need a light, I need a guide
Someone to lead me through my fog filled soul.
To lead me to the light. To love.
To fight beside me against my poisoned half.

I hope someday I'll find that strength, that will to crush the darkness
To take full control of my being and my destiny
I hope that day comes soon.

The Stubborn Fool's Battle

I've lost a battle I should have known not to fight

The warning's were given, try as they might

I thought I had the high ground, we were as high as a kite

Yet in the end, the noose round my neck became tight

The worst part of all is the enemy who won

An enemy not even fighting, he had no loaded gun

He's far from the battlefield, not even under the same sun

Yet I was warned, perhaps I should have run

The real enemy is myself though, the demons I hold inside

They don't play by the rules, no guidelines do they abide

They punch at my spirit, they break up its stride

So try as I might, I still drown in the tide

I'm not saying I regret this battle I've fought

For even in losing, many a lesson is taught

So many sayings start here, they say fret not!

You'll do better next time, the culprit will be caught!

And you'll win the battle you know you should win

Don't be afraid to go seeking, don't be afraid to begin

To not even try would be a much graver sin

Take the slap on both cheeks, take them both with a grin

So no quarter shall I give, I won't run away

I'll fight this war, in this battle I'll stay

In the very thick of it, right into the fray

My feelings wont shake, from this path there's no sway

I wonder now if these words will find their mark

My bloods in the water, I need only the shark

I want them to be heard, their impression to to be stark

I hope these words now written, will save me from the dark

-C. Barber

The Words In My Head

Quickly the words come into my mind

With no pause and no halt, they are easy to find

They are filled with energy of the most unusual kind

They are sweet yet tangy like a lemon rind

They plop and they flop and they jump all around

Luckily from my mouth they don't make a sound

some are fluffy others pointy but mostly they're round

for new inspiration I think I have found

What inspiration you ask, what could it possibly be?

unfortunately for us all we'll have to wait and see

just know that its there, you could invite it to tea

or sit with it under a shady tree

but even these words they could come with a price

for words, even written, dont always play nice

some hurt, others heal, some are meant to entice

they can get you in situations as tight as a vice

but these words I will write, because this moment is rare

inspiration does not always find me, it doesn't always care

so write them I shall, we'll see how I fare

to you my good friends these words l will share